My daughter used to engage in this. I figured it was Peer influence and as the previous commenter mentioned, I thought it was exaggeration in order to get attention. I have observed how that behavior has spilled over into adulthood. As in, if someone feels anything negative (upset, hurt, offended) it's expected that fir that alone, you need to give sympathy. There's no self reflection. I absolutely understand and appreciate that nowadays there is better mental health support. I wished, I had received more understanding and tools for dealing with things. Navigating emotions in life when you can 'safely' air it online is not the best way to learn to deal with it.
Online validation seems easier to get than the meaningful stuff from her family. It's hard to say, so since tou are a writer here, grab a piece of pretty paper, handwrite her a real love letter of old times when she surprised you and the th I ngs she did and said that made you proud. Put it in a snail mail envelope packaged with her favourite candy, and post it to her today.
A few things are more impressive than social media sympathy. One is a present in the mail.
This is a great article! I had no idea that this even had a name. I usually just ignore people that post exaggerated emotions. I figure they are looking for attention. I don't have kids but I think everyone should know about this.
It's amazing what you can find out when you listen to the news. Then during my research, I found out more terms pertaining to teens that I haven't decided to write or not. Thank you for your kind words. :-)
I'd never heard of sadfishing either, I will drop into a family conversation soon to show myself how wrong it is. To get witnesses to my supercilious nature.
I'm a bit quest about revealing this trope
But this morning, before I read Pam's glorious post
My daughter used to engage in this. I figured it was Peer influence and as the previous commenter mentioned, I thought it was exaggeration in order to get attention. I have observed how that behavior has spilled over into adulthood. As in, if someone feels anything negative (upset, hurt, offended) it's expected that fir that alone, you need to give sympathy. There's no self reflection. I absolutely understand and appreciate that nowadays there is better mental health support. I wished, I had received more understanding and tools for dealing with things. Navigating emotions in life when you can 'safely' air it online is not the best way to learn to deal with it.
It's so sad when teens go down this rabbit hole.
Online validation seems easier to get than the meaningful stuff from her family. It's hard to say, so since tou are a writer here, grab a piece of pretty paper, handwrite her a real love letter of old times when she surprised you and the th I ngs she did and said that made you proud. Put it in a snail mail envelope packaged with her favourite candy, and post it to her today.
A few things are more impressive than social media sympathy. One is a present in the mail.
This is a great article! I had no idea that this even had a name. I usually just ignore people that post exaggerated emotions. I figure they are looking for attention. I don't have kids but I think everyone should know about this.
It's amazing what you can find out when you listen to the news. Then during my research, I found out more terms pertaining to teens that I haven't decided to write or not. Thank you for your kind words. :-)
I'd never heard of sadfishing either, I will drop into a family conversation soon to show myself how wrong it is. To get witnesses to my supercilious nature.
I'm a bit quest about revealing this trope
But this morning, before I read Pam's glorious post
I did remind my lawyer daughter to hurry up
and finish my will
so it can be signed and witnessed quickly-
just in case
She groaned
but I could hear her
smiling as she said:
Don't worry about this legacy shit Mum,
We will never forget you
No one who's met you
could ever forget you.
Dreadful behaviour from me
I know
I will have a go at being less of a sadfisher.
Ditto.
Comprehensive, wise, expansive
I feel like I've even been guilty of this as an adult
I've compliment fished withg ridiculous posts like:
I AM SAD
SEND YOUR PUPPY PICTURES TO CHEER
ME UP
I feel a tinge of shame
For displaying sadfishing
Substack is for grown up astute writers
Like you Pam Lokker
I need to learn to validate myself
To prop myself up with crutches when I need them
And bolster real self esteem in the actions
of giving and allowing love
to fill me up when my body
starts running low
You are amazing P L
You have no reason to feel shame. And you are very much a grown-up astute writer.
I feel likexa big girl now. Ta.
Sorry writing g on phone mucks up my words.
Thanks for the vote of confidence.