5 Skills to Improve Effective Communication

Excuses for not doing something happen to us all.

I get so tired of people fading into the woodwork and not texting, calling, or emailing with weak excuses about why they couldn't do something. Why can't they communicate with you? How hard can that be?

In today's digital age, where communication is just a click away, it's strange why we often ask, "Why haven't they replied?" or "Why did they ghost me?"

Wikipedia explains communication by saying, "Communication is usually defined as the transmission of information." There are so many reasons we need people to tell us why they couldn't do this or that. Why didn't you pick up Johnny after school? Why didn't you call the babysitter? Why, why, and why? There are many reasons that something doesn't get done, both at home and work. They seem to fade into the woodwork. When they fail to reach out, this can leave you with feelings of hurt, confusion, frustration, or anger.

The Disappearing Act

People disappearing without a trace, often called 'ghosting,' isn't new. However, it has become more prevalent in the age of instant messaging and social media. In this technological era, one might argue that the sheer volume of daily interactions makes it impossible to keep up. But is that a valid excuse?

The Lame Excuses

We've all heard them: "I was too busy," "I forgot," or "I thought I replied." While life can indeed get hectic, and we all have moments of forgetfulness, it's essential to recognize the difference between a genuine oversight and a pattern of neglect. If someone consistently fails to communicate, it's less about their forgetfulness and more about their priorities (and not yours).

The Simplicity of Communication

Sending a text, calling, or shooting an email has never been easier. It takes mere seconds to type out a message and hit send. So, when someone doesn't do it, it's not about the task's difficulty but rather the intent (or lack thereof) behind it.

How to improve communication skills

It's not hard to use effective communication. Below are five tips to enhance your communication skills:

1. Active Listening – Before you go off the handle and hastily respond with pent-up emotions, listen – and understand what they are saying.

2. Clear and Concise Messaging – You need to be direct, but you don't have to be nasty about your message. Avoid jargon, and try to organize what you'll say before you say it.

3. Non-verbal cues – In face-to-face situations, non-verbal cues can be instrumental in determining if they have a valid excuse or if they're pulling your leg.

4. Empathy and Open-mindedness – Empathy is putting yourself in another person's shoes. Being open-minded ensures you understand what they may be going through and why they couldn't do what they said they would do.

5. Feedback and Reflection - Regularly seek feedback on your communication style to help you identify improvement areas. Were you clear as to your expectations? This self-awareness is crucial for continuous improvement in communication.

Remember, like any skill, communication improves with practice and conscious effort. By integrating these tips into your daily interactions, you'll likely find your communication skills improving and more getting done. 😊

Final thoughts

While it's easy to feel hurt or frustrated when things are not getting done, we all have life challenges that we need to navigate. Practical communication skills like active listening, clear and concise messaging, non-verbal cues, empathy and open-mindedness, and feedback and reflection can lessen misunderstandings.

Life can often get in the way of our best intentions. If someone continually fails to communicate, it might be time to evaluate their role in your life. After all, personal or professional relationships thrive on open communication and mutual respect.